The [unmasked] part of me

good morningZ

thefortyniner — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 16:31:39 +0000

Hmmmm, kok pake lupa yah buat ngereport tentang kemaren?? (: when everything, well not everything, but almost everything was perfect. talked to the guy, clear the mess with the girl, everybody’s happy

jadi cowok di kelas psychology gue didn’t show up again, so i thought, hmmm ya sudah lah. chances with michael aja udah cukup. dia juga ganteng kok (hehehehe) so waktu design mulai, kan kita harus kritik2 project 7 trus si michael duduk deket gue. tapi ga ada time untuk ngajak ngomong duluan lah. jujur aja, gue udah rada gak tekad untuk kenalan soalnya, duh ga tau dehhhh. semangat udah rada putus ditengah jalan.

tapi eh tetapi

sahabat gue itu udah pasang ancang2 duluan! jadi pas kita keluar, ({kan kita selalu keluar barengan), dia tuh yang bukain pintu buat si michael dan langsung ngajak ngomong “so you’re majorin in industrial design too?”

Wahhhh, ini sudah kaga bener! ini udah ngaco. alhasil gue langsung ‘trying’ to take over the conversation lah. untungnyaaa sahabat gue itu harus pisah arah karena dia kan nyetir. jadi gue ama michael jalan sampe depan. ohmygattt, senengnyaaaaaaaaaaaaa gue. akhirnya bisa ngobrol walaupun dikit tapi at least udah ada percakapan gitu lohhhh. :):)

eh bentar i’ll write later, udha mulai lecture….

Random thought of the day:

thefortyniner — Sun, 18 Oct 2009 20:28:28 +0000

“If everybody has a PhD degree, who will work as a CNA, RNA, and gas station officer?”

Hmmmmm ~_~

BAPA!!!!!!

thefortyniner — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 21:34:14 +0000

this one is special for my Father up above…

Bapa! kok tega banget sihhhhh. udah dandan cakep2, udah sengaja beli jaket ama tas baru kemaren, sudah kau ijinkan anakmu yang satu lagi muji daku “i like what you’re wearing”, ehhhhhhhhh but you gave me a big olld hole of dissapointment!!! hhhhhh Bapa bapa bapa, mengapa ini yang terjadi??? omgggggggggggggggg

Rasanya tuh mo pingsan tau ga sih. udah susah2, tapi sang kakanda nya aja kaga ada. try to think positively, mungkin si kakanda rumahnya kebanjiran jadinya ga bisa sekolah. huh! mate lo! emangnya ini di indonesia apa, where everywhere is banjir all the time all seasons! enggak kan! atau mungkin dia lagi males sekolah makanya dia bolos. whatever it is, udah cukup untuk menghancurkan semangat ’45 gue. apa kaga jodoh apa gue ama dia. buset dah! buset beset deh hati gua!!!!

haduh udah kez.udah….ambil napas pelan2, jangna biarkan satu cowok merusak hari mu. hari ini? emang hari ini enak??? byasa aja kokkkkkk. jadi ditambah dengna si dia kaga dateng, ya bikin hari gue jadi lebih doomed lagi lah!

haaaaaaah, harusnya sih ini cukup memompa adrenaline gue supaya gue berani untuk ngajak ngomong tu cowok yang di kelas design. HARUSNYA SIH!!! tapi apa malah ini membuat diriku tambah tidak berdaya?? mana kedinginan pula kaki gue. Bapa, mana nih blessings in disguise? it seems like trouble after trouble comes after me. udah nilai phil test gue F, ga berhasil2 juga untuk negor si ganteng, temen belom dapet, oh my gosh,

terus bertahan dalam iman. terus percaya dengan that blessing in disguise. ya tapi keki juga sih

very emotional

thefortyniner — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 14:51:05 +0000

Dreams sometimes affect the way people act the following day and I never really believe it. Until today.

I had a super weird dream last night. And here’s the thing, I seem to remember the CONCEPT of my dream, but i FORGOT exactly what happened. the key word from my dream last night would be “EVERYONE” everyone can……even if….. that’s pretty much the concept. but it gave me enough chills and i woke up with a bad mood. Snapped my brother, acting up to my dad and just pretty much my mom was like “are you okay? why do you look so pissed off?” and to avoid any further hassle i just answered that i don’t know.

But seriously, that dream is bugging the hell out of me. it gave me fright! Like i don’t want that dream to happen. My moom kept swing until now, and I felt like if just any little thing can go wrong today, it better not involve me, cuz i will for sure can blow up like a bomb. Shheees, i hate this part of me. Maybe i’m experiencing pMS?? but i’m not sure. ang jelas, this is annoying enough to handle a day.

Sigh. i WONDER what’s gonna happen today. I don’t feel like going, but I have to because i have philosophy test today and (right at this moment i just remember that i forgot to bring my scantron. DAMN IT)

AND i have to go to my math profesor office hours to discuss the homework. pretty much i’m very busy today. if i want i could ditch my second class, but it’s not worth it cuz i need the notes. agh FML =/

operasi kenalan with cutie= gagal :l

thefortyniner — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 21:40:44 +0000

Kalo kata tuyul yang di sinetro tuyul dan mbak yul gagal maning son! gagal maning!!

iyah gagal kenalan ama si cowok itu!

Jadi kan gue udah semangat gitu yah, semangat 45 untuk kenalan ama cowok ganteng ini. gue akan duduk di sebelah dia, basa-basi dikit, dan kenalan. jam 1:45 gue udah masuk ke kelas mengharapkan sang perjaka duduk “nungguin” gue. tapi gue ga liat dia! hmmmm odd, tapi ya udah g bolak-balik muter , siapa tau dia masih di luar, kedua kalinya gue masuk, masih gak ada juga. nah, kemana ni orang? tapi waktu udah mepet jadinya gue pikir, yah mungkin dia absen.

so gue duduk aja deh. di barisan ke 2. tengok kanan tengok kiri, ohmaigat, itu dia cowok “gue”!!!!!!! duduk di row depan gue tapi jauh dari gue. kayak 4 seat dari gue. masya oloh keselnya hati gue. ternyata rambutnya dia beda, di turunin jadinya beda. tapi tetep aja kenapa gue ga pelan2 liat. gues what, kanan kirinya udah ada yang nempatin. rasanya kesell anjrit. langsung deh gue sms laron, laporan. huuuu poor sister.

tapi gue udah menghitung dia duduk di row berapa dan dia duduk di row 4. Ok, hari rabu gue akan duduk di row 4. liatin aja. hari rabu, gue akan kenalan ama dia. MUNGKINNN tuhan ga memperkenankan gue kenalan ama dia karena tampang gue beler hari ini (eye liner gue aneh ga tau kenapa jadi tampang gue rada weird) jadi kan ga memungkinkan untuk kenalan. yah bikin hati seneng aja, cari excuse. hahahahahhaha

byasanya sih sekarang, gue udah ngerasa bodoin amat dan i will do anything whatsoever untuk get over this. sapa tau gue entar nekat di kelas design kenalan ama cowok asia itu. gue sih udah muka tembok nih sekarang, saking keselnya (:

office party

thefortyniner — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 20:00:03 +0000

So there’s gonna be a a christmas party at my workplace and until now

they haven’t found the location
the food
and whats gonna happen there.

Makes me so effin GEREGETANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. this is a freakin party! might as well make it counts.

So i was thinking, we should have a photobooth. it is so cool, fun, and i’m sure will bring laughs to everybody! but on the contrary, it’s hard to set up a photo booth. The least i can think of someone sets up a macbook, or an iMac because they already have built in camera, allows people to take pictures, hence “photobooth”, but then i don’t know how to hook them up to a printer. Cuz people surely will want to have a copy of those pictures, right?!

So i thought, ok if photobooth doesn’t work out, what about a dance off??

Like that one episode in wizards of waverly place when they did dance off with the zombies. lets say: activities vs. nursing department (LMAO, i can’t imagine us doing battle off with the nurses ;P )

and then, move on.

I was thinking we should rent out some games ie: DDR, wii fit, rock band, guitar hero

BUTTTTTT

the problem is if we dont have enough spaces. the games itself, we can just rent them, but do we even have enough space for all those games????

and one more thing, these are adults, they’re not teenagers. So i think the idea of fun party for them, is cocktail party.

i’m screwed. ughhhhhh =/

Another new day

thefortyniner — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 19:40:20 +0000

Good morning, or should I say good afternoon because it’s already 12:32 pm now But anyways, a new day has come for all of us, the human creatures.

I woke up at 7:45 (snoozed 3 times already) and left home at around 8:45. frikin bus 50 came in an hour, I was freezing my arse to death but thank god it actually came and from then on, the journey begins

I had one and only one purpose to go to school today, to go to the freakin math lab and start cleaning up my online math homework. i’ve had it with these damn online homeworks. They are supposed to be easy one hundred points, because they’re freakin online! You can ask around before you do it. But yesterday, i received my math midterm grades, and i am a C. i have 70.0% in the class. that’s some fucked up shit i know . sorry for the cussing, but i can never resist to cuss in matters of school.

So yeah, because of that freakin C, i decided to make math lab as my second home. Today I went there and successfully finished almost all my homework, WITH right answers. not only math lab, I will also use my professor’s office hours starting tomorrow. Tomorrow, I will go to her and discuss about some of the math problems.

It’s about time I fix my fucked up grades. leT’S see abut the other classes

1. Psych 100: I’m doing good. The monday tests are the key, so I’m fine
2. Desn 120a: I’m doing ok as well. just need to survive the tests and improve the qualities of my projects.
3.Phil 170: fucked up big time. I need a miracle in this class
4.Geog 100: I have a B so far, and this class shouldn’t be hard either because the tests are online. I can take the test in 2 hours! Last test, I was screwed, but the following tests, I promised myself I will get top score
5.Math 109: currently has C. but with a little more motivation and good test scores, I will get at least B.

So from now, the only class that i’m screwed is philosophy. Let’s see what i can do for this class. I have test tomorrow, i hope i can get C in that test.

Aside from my school shit, my little brother texted me to use the advice that my cousin gave to talk to that boy. Thanks little brother! you’re awesome

Can’t wait until psych starts, I’m gonna sit next to him!!! yay yaya~

shitty day

thefortyniner — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 01:18:17 +0000

I had a shitty day today at work. Very annoying, very weird. Yeah, I would never guess he actually wants to marry me and kiss me.

yeah, what the fuk right????

and i have no idea whether he did this because he really doesn’t know what he’s doing, or because he really likes me. hold on guys, before you all jump to conclusion, let me clarify that this man, is an old man! a grandpa! ok seriously, I look up to him! he was a great engineer and all, and like he’s really great and friendly. he would always come to me and greet me with smile everytime i come to work. he’s like the reason i go to work, and i see him like a real grandpa, because i never feel i had one! Today, it all changed. my perspective completely changed, and now everytime I see him, i feel very unappreciative, i avoid him and seriously, just want to stay the fuck away from him. This is really unfortunate.

A part of me feels mad at myself too because I know I’m too nice, I’m too naive. I let myself off guard to easily and that’s wrong. But what can i do? that’s my character! I’m just doing what they expect me to be, be nice, be friendly and don’t be mean. apparantly, people took me for granted. so far, there are 2 guys that take advantage of me already and it pisses the shit outta me. It’s like they know i’m really young, and i can’t take action to prevent myself from falling to deep. my friend has to come and protect me from this, but i don’t want to be always depend on him. that’s sad.

but yeah, just feel really shitty right now. felt like throwing up, no actually, felt like just go lay down, but i’m too lazy. gonna go to cousins’ house in bit, and hopefully get to see my little brother as well.

bye <3

First stressful day of college

thefortyniner — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 03:38:41 +0000

Psh, today, i felt shitty. I think it is my very first stressful day of college. My class doesn’t start till 2 but I’m at school already since like 7:45. I waited with several other kids for the library to open. When the librarian unlock the door, i rushed in and went right ahead to 4th floor, and found the perfect place for me and for my laptop to keep charged.

I spent until like 10:30 (because of the stupid fire drill) doing my philosophy extra credit. KUTU KUPRET BANYAK BANGET! mana gue ga bawa banyak paper jadinya, akhirnya i decided to made it like really really compact. at that time, mood gue udah ga banget tuh. untung kuping gue ditemenin dengan lagu2 asik dari chris tomlin, jeremy camp and sonicflood, jadi masih agak mendingan.

Alright, udah mulai uring2an karena extra creditnya seem to be endless, ehhhhhhh fire drill started! So we had to grabbed our stuffs and go out of the building. ohmygoshh, i have so many craps to take care of. and guess what, i lost my mouse’s uSB port. yep, so now my mouse is useless. how pathetic.

So i can’t stand to continue my philosophy extra credit, i decided to finish my math homework and i even asked help from neya lucy and wawa. it worked though then i went to the beach hut, bought lunch then continued my excel assignment.

By the time psychology starts, i’m done with my excel assignment, my online homework. YAY! and then, here comes the highlight of my day.

This super cute guy stands like 5 ft away from me. And me of course, always being a coward when it comes to guys ;P , just stand there, feeling weird, hoping I will sit next to him. well….close

i sat behind him, right behind him. nOT ENOUGH
!!! i shouldve went right ahead next to him. but omg, he was so cuteeeee, and his head almost hit my laptop lOL. it would’ve been cooler if he did though, that way i had something to talk about with him

Why monday always suck

thefortyniner — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 03:40:43 +0000

Now why is it that on Mondays, I always fell asleep in psych and the class atmosphere always seem intense/unfriendly in desn 120. i have no clue! Maybe this is just from my own thoughts? or is it that Mondays have always been the worst day ever!

By the way, psych test today, EPIC fail, got a C so that brought my grades down to a B. shiz! i hate it, but i can’t blame anyone but me, because I didn’t study at all. I even made the study guide while Iming with my friend, so really it was all my fault. And then, I felt so so sleepy in that class! After test, which is like note taking time, I fell asleep! Dude, not even kidding.

And then, desn 120 was pretty intense again, as we talked about our texture project. Dan seperti biasa, project gue sepi2 aja, ga ada yang komentar. sementara projek temen gue dipuji2 banget. jealous much? haha. iya sih, cuma bodoin lah, I did my best, might as well deserve those little comments

Today, my parents’ movie project came out great! shiz! can’t wait until everybody got their chances to record, putting them altogether, and try it out at church. Oh and waiting for the mont blanc pen to come! yup yup :]